The theme at NEXT was "Win the Heart". This may come as a bit of a surprise but that theme didn't exactly get me amped up as we headed to Anaheim, California. But, 4 days without kids in California with free food and seeing some good friends that we don't see often still was something to look forward to.
Day 2 began with Trudy White (Truett's daughter and John White's mom) sharing a bit of her story. A part of that story included the beginning of their time in Brazil. She was having trouble picking up Portuguese, the primary language there, and her inability to communicate easily was contributing to a feeling of being completely overwhelmed and at the end of a particularly hard day she turned to God in desperation. "Help!!"
As Trudy shared this, I realized something. Language about "winning the heart" isn't my native language. In fact, I had just talked with Kaylyn a couple weeks ago about how I need help understanding the feelings and emotions that are occuring in our family. It's not something I naturally pick up quickly. It's like Portuguese was for Trudy. I realized right then that I had not turned to God for help in this area. I had been content not being able to "speak the language" but I realized that in doing so, I was beginning to get overwhelmed and limiting the person God created me to be.
Just as God responded to Trudy's plea, He has been waiting for me to ask. "God, I don't understand all this! Help!"
At NEXT, we have a few options of sessions we can attend and I typically choose those that interest me. In that moment, I felt a nudge to select a session that I'd never have chosen for fun. "Cultivating a Healthy Soul". I think Kaylyn was just a wee-bit surprised when I told her I was going to that one with her. There were other "practical" options...
After that morning, instead of looking for affirmations that we were doing all the right things and that I'm a good leader, I was paying close attention to how I could learn to "win the heart". Beginning with my own heart. Then others.
Right now, it's all still a foreign language to me. It might as well be Portuguese. But, I'm learning. HE is winning my heart.
